We had a fall storm on the horizon. It has been an unusually pleasant October with highs most days in the 60-80s. Hence I still had the outdoor furniture out. In addition, we really hadn’t had many fires this year, if any. I developed this plan for a last hurrah before I put all the furniture in for the season. I was going to build a fire and we would roast sausages and make smores.

I wanted to keep the menu very simple. I wanted everything outside around the fire. So, what goes well with fire roasted sausages, but potato chips. I wanted some dip too so I picked some up at the store. Since my vegetarian son is in Taiwan, I could get clam dip and not feel guilty about not getting a second option.

I while I was starting the fire, I opened the bag and scooped a few chips. We had a late breakfast and I was already planning on getting a late start to dinner. I was also doing some painting at the same time and I needed to get to a stopping point before dinner took over. That dip was terrible. It was bland and gelatinous.

When we finally settled down for dinner, I scooped a few more chips and no I wasn’t imagining it, the dip was downright disgusting. How can this be so bad? I flipped to the ingredients and then the answer was instantly clear. This is a toxic stew of garbage.

Here is an example recipe

  • 8 oz cream cheese , softened
  • 1/4 cup sour cream
  • 1 clove garlic , minced
  • 1/4 teaspoon dried parsley flakes (or 1 teaspoon fresh chopped parsley)
  • 1/2 teaspoon worcestershire sauce
  • Dash Tabasco or favorite hot sauce
  • 1, 6.5 oz can minced clams drained but juice reserved

I realize that if I were to expand this list to the ingredients to include those in cream cheese and sour cream, it would become something different, slightly longer. But really there is not excuse for the number of thickeners, extenders and modifiers that is in this store bought dip. I would venture to say that this does not qualify as food even though it may be edible.

I should have known better. About six months ago I purchased a different brand French Onion dip. It was equally terrible. These were not the chip dips of my memory. They were smooth, tangy and slightly addictive, certainly not bland and repulsive.

We very rarely ever had chip dip growing up. When we did, it was Christmas or something like that. So, it could be that my memory of what it was and what it actually was are two different things. Honestly, I don’t think so because just looking at the dip in the container looks wrong. I guess I will never know, but I suspect the contents have changed significantly over the years.

End Your Programming Routine: Honestly, I am going to be polite if I see this stuff put out in other venues. That being said, this is one of those things that you are better off making it yourself or not at all. I am eating some instant noodles as I write this right now. They are also terrible. But I did not expect them to be good. Disappointment is a far stronger emotion than dislike. Don’t buy chip dip.