I was expecting to be finished with one book yesterday and begin the Fourth Turning series today. This post is more to inform that I haven’t even started reading yet. I do expect to begin the Fourth Turning next week, I am just unprepared at the moment.
This has been a season that I am ready to move on from. It is hard to explain but it feels like I have been waiting all year to get ready for the next thing only to find that I am still waiting and having things get in the way. That is a frustrating feeling for me and it doesn’t bode well for the upcoming year.
I don’t want to offer excuses but since I said that I intended to start the series this week, I needed to reset expectations. Having holidays in the middle of the week and not taking any additional time off has essentially caused all of the extra curricular activities to occur every day. On the first, I fell asleep on the couch about 6:30 PM out of sheer exhaustion. That was my first down day since early December.
I suppose the prime question is are things going to get better for me? I sure hope so but I also would like to know the answer. We can only do what we do. I plan to try and find some zen in the storm so I can keep on keeping on. Look to getting back on track next week.
It has been kind of a ho-hum year if I have to say so myself. I am going to look back at the AtF4 highlights or favorites today. One thing that kind of sticks out to me is that I think this has been the flattest year of AltF4 to date. It was a year of long book series, long running projects and fighting cancer. I went through the effort of looking back from my entire year to see what it is I did and what I liked.
January – I started out thinking I was going to build a wine cellar. First, I wanted to move the ducts.
March – It wasn’t sexy, but it was one of the best projects I should have done years ago. I finished raising the ducts into the stud bays.
April – Chemo started. I also started buying some radios. I got my GMRS license.
June – I started planning my PCT hike. I also started spotty walking in an effort to get into shape.
July – My wife had her stem cell transplant. I spent the entire month away from home.
August – I survived reading The Devine Comedy
October – Burn out is realized. I took a nice five day fishing vacation with my dad, uncle and brother.
November – Family trip to Montana for Thanksgiving. Who could forget the Election results as well.
December – The theme of this month was fatigue.
Of course, there is nothing more important than fighting for your life and the business that comes with it. As a result when I looked through the year, I felt like my writing was much more diverse and interesting in the first quarter of the year. It has gone steadily down hill since that time. I had a hard time even finding some highlights toward the end of the year.
Not every month got a mention in my summary because I didn’t see a post that I felt was remarkable or fully inspired for the month. I think that was a combination of my selection for what I was talking about and doing and my personal life. Long running works and little time made a diversity of topics scarce.
The trip to Montana was definitely one to remember. That being said, not everything is for sharing here. It also went by so fast and then we launched directly Christmas that it was hard to get any sort of rest as a result. I would say that I am starting the year at a deficit. I have a deficit of topics and plans going into 2025.
I can tell that because despite not posting for the entire last week, I am still struggling to get this out in time. I keep looking for that dose of Vitamin B and is going to turbo charge that feeling I was getting when I started this endeavor in 2019. Intuitively, I knew that the novelty of my series Pursuit of Happiness that I did in 2021 just has not materialized in the last year. I haven’t really even done any projects that I was proud of since I started the duct work.
I always like to look forward and not just back. Guess what? I think it is going to be another year of the same. Plans are moving forward for my hike which means that most of my spare time is going to be dedicated to training and practice. Things have basically slipped since Thanksgiving. I am hoping that the new year will finally clear up the social schedule (but probably not the weather).
We are also planning on hosting our (former) Spanish exchange student’s family for a week of Pacific Northwest touring June. So that will be a week of my vacation plus a week of hiking and I will be mostly tapped out for the year. We talked about travelling to Taiwan over Christmas but that has not been solidified.
End Your Programming Routine: Maybe I shouldn’t be so hard on myself because despite how I feel about my creative output, it was a very successful year from a personal standpoint. My wife beat cancer, my oldest son beat the school system, my younger son beat his exchange and is on his way to his last year in school. That is something worthy of being happy about. So, let’s kick 2024 to the curb to hopefully find a better 2025.
It’s that time of year again that everyone is looking forward. Only 9% of people are still working on New Year’s resolutions by the end of the year. Why is that? I talk a lot about that today and what you can do about it. This topic applies throughout the entire year, not just at the beginning but we all have to start somewhere.
For the Rest Of Us… Festivus is becoming a tradition around here for good reason. I’ve got a lot of problems with you people. I talk a lot of sports, some politics and current issues. This is part of wrapping up the year that I am in the midst of at this time. I am warning you that I ran a little long. But, I will give you a break next week. Happy Festivus from AltF4.
I am kind of behind the eight ball here. It has been party after party, late night after late night and working like a banshee. Add to that some emotional struggles not just what I wrote yesterday but also some additional drama. So, a normal Christmas season. I need to get my Festivus podcast put together so I am putting out a cheap one here.
I had planned to review a book that I am reading. I thought that I had two weeks to go to finish it and I haven’t read a page since. That is getting pushed to next year since I am taking a break for Christmas. The other day, I checked the mailbox and it was crammed full of envelopes. It took me four handfuls to empty it.
This picture is 41 benefits statements from the insurance company. I couldn’t help but laugh and laugh as I was sorting through the pile. I surmised that the hospital finally got around to submitting to the insurance company for my wife’s treatment over the summer. I only read a couple to make sure they were for the same event. Sure enough, it was.
We are definitely not there yet, but I imagine that this is the kind of practice that is going disappear as Artificial Intelligence gets a real footing. The reason being is that this logic is pretty complicated. A thinking person would say, one claim and one document. Instead of generating a document for every line item, it would be one document with every transaction (think bank statement).
But, this gets into the complication of the logic. You can imagine that each vendor/provider/service ends up with a different task code or billing line. With that each of those equal a transaction. The logic then ties each transaction a letter. This way the system does not have to know if these transactions are related or not. It is the simplest way of laying things out. And simple is always the most robust.
If there is any doubt, this is what I do. Take a scenario, break it down into to the steps, that is critical to getting it right. A warning though, the output is always important. The reason it is critical is that the output changes all of the details within the steps. As an example, I have often had to deliver reports (letters in this case) with the project. And often those are an after thought, with the assumption that all of the data is captured. But when it is not, then sometimes you have to even re-program the steps and step logic to capture.
Because the software process is complicated and technical, what goes on behind the scenes is obscure. For that reason, the industry has become reliant on sloppy practices. Think about electric cars. I hear that a new model (like the Mustang Mach-E) consistently has improved over time. Without substantial infrastructure changes, a 2020 model is essentially the same as a 2024 model. This is because they are running the same operating system if you will.
Because nobody knows what is going on at the consumer level, the industry uses this as cover to release substandard code and iterate to a final or better state. Realize that some of this is a necessary evil, it is not just a conspiracy theory. The reality is that there are deadlines and that a manufacturer would not want to release a 2020 vehicle finally in 2024. That would also be bad for business.
The other day, I had a Windows 10 Blue Screen (of Death). This is the first time I have seen this in years. It used to be fairly common twenty years ago, in fact I didn’t even know that they still existed it has been so long. A Porche 911, is fifty years of evolution. Sure, if you compare today’s to an original, they are not the same car but the result is constant evolution. It didn’t make a leap from one generation to another. That is what software is.
I know that all of the contrarians like to highlight the simplicity of Linux and the advantages of crowd sourcing. I also agree that it is good and I appreciate the benefits. But what cannot be denied is that Microsoft has built a stable and widely accepted operating system. Good luck getting your very specialized TV tuner card to work in Linux unless you are going to program it yourself.
End Your Programming Routine: Choice is good. Sometimes what is seen as ludicrousness, waste or incompetence actually has a reason. Despite the $20 of postage to mail all of those statements out, they have to doing something to make billions in profits last year. Make no mistake, the only way insurance companies make money is by charging the patients so we paid for this but there is a method to the madness. In my book forty-one explanation of benefit statements in one day is mad.
When I took this picture, I imagined coming up with some controversial topic. In lieu of trying to dredge up some more politics or some other distasteful topic I thought I would go much deeper today. By the time I get done, hopefully it would make sense.
I often wish that I had an established therapist. I would like to have some independent input. Second to that, I probably should work harder a developing a friendships. I hear all the time on the Art of Manliness that male friendships are important to a healthy mental state. I have said several times that this is my form of therapy. Writing or podcasting allows me to think about a subject and put together a logical opinion about things.
Something happened recently that I desperately want to talk about. But, it is not my story to tell, at least yet. Of course what happened has some sort of impact on me. I have every right to react in any way because it is my genuine feelings based on me and my character. But, when I look at things objectively this has very little impact to me or my life and it would be best to wait and talk about the details of the situation here when it is publicly acknowledged due to the sensitivity.
I am always waving the live and let live flag. As an example, if someone wants to marry their dog or file their teeth into vampire fangs, why should I care? Of course I have opinions on the whole thing but it doesn’t really matter what I think. Make no mistake, transgressions were made in the legal, ethical and moral grounds. So it is not as if I don’t have a potential claim of damages.
As Bill Handel of Handel on the Law would say, “What are the damages here”? People are constantly wronged in some way, but can you prove it? And if you can, what is the value? I say all this to say that rather than extracting revenge or issuing a penalty, the self admitted guilty may be punishment enough. I am talking about something that is a one way door. Once you go through, you cant go back. That is pretty scary.
It is pretty easy to say live and let live when it is someone else’s condition or problem. But, when it happens in your own domain, it is a little harder to stay consistent. I don’t think about this often but something like Luigi Mangione’s parents. I am assuming that they still love their child even though he did something horribly wrong. Luigi may regret it but you certainly can’t say that it was an accident or even a misstep. It was self admitted, premeditated murder. That is pretty hard to come back from.
There is no doubt that the elder Mangione’s were damaged by their son’s action. But again, what is the value? In this situation, forgiveness is still be appropriate but other actions like funding legal defense are probably out of the question of propriety. My incident is nothing like this but the point remains that children’s actions effect their parents. Even public scrutiny is painful.
My wife asked how I felt about this situation. It was a loaded question as she knew because I know in my heart how I feel but I also don’t know how exactly to react. Because of the secretive nature, because of the one way commitment and because of the wrongs involved it is hard to embrace the overall situation. Perhaps we should look at these dilemma’s with a more long term outlook.
I remember being in college and I was a Senior. My sister-in-law called my wife and said that she was pregnant at 18. My first reaction was that this was a disaster for her. When the second child came about a year later, I felt like one was already too much but two is insane. Looking back 25 years later, it all worked out. It wasn’t easy then and it has had lasting implications to this day but they all made it. It wasn’t my direction or results but then it didn’t need to be.
Using the example above, how I feel about a situation will change over time. I would always want to err on the side of caution in these kind of conflicts because I have seen first hand and the consequences thereof. It ends up with being estranged from your family as you are dying and no hope of reconciliation. That is much worse than having a justified reaction for the time and act.
I have some time before I see this person again. That means there should be plenty of time to have a dignified and controlled conversation. This is part of why I wrote this today so I could organize my thoughts and consolidate how I really feel. When it comes to actually having this conversation, my hope is that I have put enough thought to clearly articulate my feelings without all of the hurts and hang-ups of the things that will be forgotten in 25 years.
End Your Programming Routine: I have read and re-read what I have written above. Despite being obtuse, I think that the message I have conveyed is don’t be brash, don’t be reactive and things will work themselves out over time. If or when this situation becomes public, I will certainly have much more to say, including my true feelings. Until that time, it doesn’t make sense to potentially damage a relationship just because I slighted.
Every once in a while, you have to throwback to some good old days. I am not sure when I actually started this endeavor but I am sure that I have been air rifle shooting daily for over a year now. Recently, I have started doing it left handed. It is not that I have mastered right handed shooting but I have been curious if one, I can do it and two is there a difference between the two.
One thing that I have noticed is that my vision is different in each eye. My left eye seems to be blurrier than my right when I look through the scope. I have always known that I have a stigmatism, but it is minor and I never even noticed when using both eyes. Trying to see a one inch circle in questionable lighting, it does show up.
You would think that means I probably shoot better right handed right? I do, kind of. I recently shot sitting down with my body resting against the door frame. This was one of the best groups I have ever made. When I tried it left handed, it was indistinguishable from not having a body rest. However, when shooting from a chair, I actually shoot better left handed than right handed.
My theory is that over the years, I have developed bad habits right handed that I don’t have left handed. I try to practice all the right techniques with posture, stance and breathing. With that, I am getting to the point that I can see how the shot went as it hits. That doesn’t make my groups any better however. Clearly like golf, maybe to improve I really need a coach?
This group pictured is left handed, standing. Said another way, this is the result of not supporting anything while shooting. I didn’t actually measure it but I would say that it is at least double and more like triple the size of my normal sitting groups.
I haven’t done it much but standing is probably the one position that I want the most proficiency. This is the most likely situation in practical shooting. Walking along, there is a deer/elk/rabbit/squirrel. On my hunting rifle, I use my sling for extra stability when I can. This situation I am talking about is completely unaided. Master this and master all other positions.
Another surprise was that the point of impact changes depending on whether I was shooting right or left handed. I know that most people will never do what I am doing so it is probably a moot point but the principle is always the same. Sight in the scope the way you are going to shoot.
I have on my range goals to shoot handguns left handed. Of the times I have tried it, I was very bad. I have no where near the strength in my left arm so it ends up wobbling all over the place. As a result, my groups are terrible. Handguns are dubious enough to shoot good groups without support, add the inability to things steady and you know there is some work to do.
I am definitely right eye dominant and right handed. I should be shooting right handed for optimum results. It is not just for kicks to shoot weak handed, the reason to be able to do it is if you lose the ability to use your preferred hand, for whatever reason. That is more self defense kind of talk but if you never try, you never know and surely you wont do well the first time.
End Your Programming Routine: When I was in middle school, I figured I could bat left handed, so I did. I actually hit the ball better that way. I have occasionally decided to write left handed. It definitely is not as good as my right, but I think it is a function of practice. It seems like shooting is no different (for me).
I am coming back again with another year of Christmas ideas. For reference, I try to not talk about items that I talked about in previous years for a better catalog of ideas. I imagined this to be a quick run down of things that I would like but it morphed into a much longer rabbit trail. I share the whys and thoughts of some of the things that I would put on a Christmas list
Friday’s have held a lot of memories for me. When I was a young professional, Friday was the day that the decision makers left work early. The schmucks that were actually doing the work (like me) were stuck with the same everyday work and less agency to do anything. My co-worker coined the term ‘Fun Day’ Friday for that situation.
There were times in my career that I liked to work Friday nights. I could have free run on the servers without having to compete with other interests or coordinate anything. It made life so much easier to be able to work without obstruction even though I was pretty beat.
Later, as I became a manager I tried to built some team comradery by creating an open playlist on YouTube. I set the tone and then invited the team to contribute. The songs were sometimes silly, they sometimes described the week but they were always intended to blow off steam. Consequentially, I often found myself streaming music on Fridays trying to distract myself from the stress of the week.
This entire year, I have been working on catching up with the back catalog of The Art of Manliness in any free time I have had. As a result, I have not played any music on Fridays this year. To be honest, it is like a distant memory and I have forgotten that I like to do that. Sometimes it was feel good country, sometimes it was heavy metal and sometimes it was antiestablishment rap like Eminem.
The good news is that I am almost caught up and then I am going to stop looking for new podcasts for a while. After listening to podcasts constantly for the last 15 years, it is time for a little variation. It may be time to do a little house cleaning as well. I want to be entertained and inspired. Sometimes that is hard to practice when I am constantly getting input from others.
End Your Programming Routine: With most of my work being so heavy and serious, I thought it was high time to do something different. Next week I am going to have the Festivus podcast so I will be airing my grievances for the year. While that intended to be a little tongue and cheek fun, a little levity for the season is in order.
One last thing, I have decided that the next book is going to be The Fourth Turning: An American Prophecy by William Strauss and Neil Howe. Look for the first chapter review to be January 3, 2025. There are a total of 12 chapters so we will get through this book by the beginning of April. I say this with plenty of time so that you all have the ability to get a head start as we go into the new year.
Sometimes I have things that I want to do but don’t have the desire to put in all the work to do it. What I mean is that I bought a splitter and some extra cable so that I could split the signal from my AM antenna on the roof. I am thinking of adding an additional input to my scanner.
Right now, the scanner is in my office but in the future I am setting up a radio area elsewhere in the basement. I think the attached antenna to the unit works ok most of the time but given that I am in a basement, I cant help but think that there is an impact on reception. I have found that weather (or something) is giving me significant feedback at times.
I have two places to split the signal. One is outside somewhere along the house and the other is in my office. The best place to split it would be at the source but who wants to get out a ladder and make another penetration in the wall? But there is another devil out there, the penetration into my office is buried behind all of the Christmas decorations. Given all I had going on this summer, I bought the stuff but I didn’t have the desire.
Since I had to drag all the Christmas stuff out last weekend, I thought that would be the perfect time to get access and string the wire I bought over the summer. Like all things, it turned out that the process didn’t go as smoothly or quickly as I hoped. I had to drill another hole and use fish tape and monkey and fiddle around. But I got it.
The point I want to make is, being prepared and taking the opportunity saved me the work of moving all of the bins out of the way. This is not an insignificant task. It was two hours of hauling stuff upstairs last Saturday. Granted, the first time I did this, I just moved everything out of the way in the basement. But, it is still effort and it takes a lot of Tetris to get everything back in its place. I usually have to make several attempts each year as things trickle back in after the season.
The same logic goes when we were re-siding the house. I wanted to add some more energy efficient windows in my wife’s office so I ordered them as soon as the job was starting. I wanted to upgrade the skylight in the upstairs bathroom when the roof was replaced. The best time to do the job is when it is in progress so it can be flashed properly.
Our ancestors were opportunists. Yes, sometimes they set out to hunt because they were hungry. But, it is better to take advantage of a situation when they came across it. As long as they had the capability to process and preserve or hold their fortunes. I think that we have lost some of this recognition with places like always stocked grocery stores or widely open home centers. We don’t recognize opportunity when it occurs.
End Your Programming Routine: I know that our culture values constantly work. I am just as guilty of that myself. But, I don’t think our ancestors thought that way. We have shifted from doing just enough to ‘just do it’. In this case, I don’t think it is a big deal but it is that mindset training that is valuable. Unfortunately, if we don’t practice looking for opportunity then we will think about it after the fact. Then we are stuck in the ‘just do it’ mode.
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