By now, I have actually finished the book. I had a lot of seat time on the plane and with such a short book that I was able to go back and re-read things so that I could understand the colloquial vocabulary. Of course, each week we will continue to peel this onion one layer at a time, but I think completing it helps give me perspective on where things are going a little better.

Ralph and Jack get close by working together to find the beast. As the get closer in proximity of tasks and they find that they share many traits. They also find that they are looking for weaknesses. They start to get competitive on their braveness and that leads to the next event.

There is one scene (I guess that it is a scene or a part) of the chapter that the boys are dancing and getting carried away. Jack suggests instead of killing a pig that they kill one of the little people. Ralph smiles and laughs but later feels the pity and regret of the participation.

This reminds me of things that I have done that I regret as well. For instance, I have admitted that I tried marijuana a couple of times in college. I wouldn’t say that it was peer pressure that made me do it. No one goaded me or chastised me, it was me saying that I am one of you. However, after it was all said and done I regretted it (at the time).

I don’t know how many people have ever gone through the police application. One of the questions was ‘have you ever tried illegal drugs?’. As well as an application, there is also an extensive background check with interviews. So while I only did it a couple of times, who knows what others would say. Does doing something illegal disqualify you? Is it better to be honest on the application, even if it is illegal? It is better to not be in this position in the first place. And that was my real regret.

If I were sitting in a chair now and listening to this story, I would say “Of course, this all makes sense. Someone who wants to pursue and education for a career in law enforcement and spends all of their time with stoners is going to get corrupted and ultimately regret it.” I would also say “after almost thirty years since this occurred, how do you feel about it now?” I am pretty sure I would answer “I guess this was god’s plan”.

Thanks for joining in my inner dialog. I have stated that I value experience over intelligence now that I have some. The nearly 50 year old me says hey it wasn’t a big deal. Every choice has consequences and it is not clear what those are at the time that you are making them. The reason I didn’t pick it up was the value position of a good time was outweighed by the risks of continued marijuana use.

Truth be told, that experience solidified my position for other drug use. I remember one time a couple of my friends took some LSD, they offered and I declined. I have never tried it nor do I ever plan on it. But they said, if you are going to hang out with us you need to be here when we start otherwise stay away. There is something about altered reality that I really don’t want to find out about. Again, if I would not have experienced regret from marijuana who knows what would happen.

By no means am I making a value judgement. These are just kids having fun. As I advanced out of college, those experiences changed my outlook. I would characterize that as it is best to not be around things like that and that may mean people that do that. At least in part, it makes my limited social circle a pretty tight ring to expand. Of course, you have to look how your relationships are based. If it is based on questionable activities, there is a significant chance that a some point, something is going to get escalated at some point.

End Your Programming Routine: There is a lot of ‘analysis’ about the book. The general direction of opinion is that this scene is an increased savagery of the boys, including the more pure Ralph. I get the sense that the pundits are looking for the story to justify their premise. But again, more on that in the future. For a normal person, getting carried away and regretting it is part of being a normal human. Only sociopaths wouldn’t feel that way.